tap into strengths

what have the Roman's ever done for us?

Fortitudo et spes (strength and hope)

Parenting is an interesting balancing act at the best of times, but when you add GCSEs into the mix, the dominant narrative is that we should expect at least one wheel to fall of the metaphorical wagon and that all involved should armour-up and painfully endure the process. Now I’m not trying to undermine anyone’s struggle. Exam season has its moments and for some this can be overwhelming. But when words like ‘superbum’ and ‘fatiscunt’ emerged in my son’s Latin revision, I found it difficult to be all doomsday-ish about it.

Listening to him place the words into amusing, if possibly inappropriate sentences, something struck me. He was playing to his strengths. If the goal is to learn the words, and you can use your strength of finding humour to do this, why wouldn’t you? Results day will reveal if this was a good approach or not, but it certainly felt like we were moving things forward. And we had fun!

Instead of treating exams, or other big life stuff, as a problem we need to fix or an ordeal that we must do battle with, why don’t we focus on the outcome we’re trying to achieve and tap into our strengths to help us achieve it?

Cum tractu traductor (it comes with the territory)

It’s not like exams rear up as a surprise. Whatever your views on their merits as a useful (or not) measure of intelligence and progress, if you’re in mainstream education, they are part of the deal. Yet as exam season arrives each year, there are countless articles and on-line conversations about how to ‘get through’ or ‘survive’. How to help those feeling overwhelmed and anxious. How to deal with teenagers navigating the hat-trick of exam pressure, a desire for independence plus a bucket load of hormones.

But where’s the balance? Where are the articles that show us that exams may be tough, but so are kids? Forums where we share the brilliant or ridiculous things we’ve said and done to keep things in perspective? Stories that reveal the unique strengths young people have and use independently, reassuring us that they’ll be OK in life, regardless of whether they get a 5 or a 9 in Physics or regularly lose a coat enroute. As my friend’s son insightfully quipped ‘’Don’t worry. What’s the worst that can happen apart from utter failure and despair?’’

Humour is a great strength and one that serves us well in day to day social and professional environments. I’m proud to watch my son and his mates practise this in ways that help them engage with the task, connect with each other and restore balance in challenging circumstances: ‘’Yes, I’d forgotten my pencils and protractor, but my Maths teacher leant me his. He knows a winner when he sees one!’’

Like other big life moments, exams can take over for a while. But soon they’re done and whatever the results, there’s a good chance we’ll have seen strengths like humour, resilience, creativity, empathy, determination and collaboration in play.

So, maybe we should consider looking at scenarios like exams as an opportunity for us to learn more about who we are and what we can do? An opportunity to help us observe and develop the unique strengths that surface at such times? These are the strengths that will help us to be useful and give us something to tap into as we strive to survive, succeed and keep moving forward in life.

nosce te ipsum (know thyself)

I went to the local comprehensive where Latin was definitely not on the curriculum, classes were big and boisterous, and the teachers were happiest in the holidays. But alongside the odd truly inspiring English lesson, I gained life skills - how to use humour and distraction to (mostly) avoid fights in the top-playground and how to listen rather than talk in class with a German teacher who would probably not be allowed near young people today. I learned that not all the noisy, confident ones are right – sometimes the quieter ones have the answer in the room; and that if something is wrong, you should stand up for what’s right, despite what others may say or do in response.

These strengths have served me well in both my personal and professional life. They don’t always make things easy, but they help me to create the balance I need to keep moving forward. Our strengths help define who we are and what we do. They help us respond to the realities we face whilst keeping us anchored in what is important to us. They give us something we can rely on - a proven capability that we can tap into to stay responsive to change, deal with challenges and go after opportunities.

Understanding what our strengths are and learning how to use them takes practise. For Leaders and Organisations recognising, developing and evolving the strengths they have alongside knowing what strengths they need, is no different.

Animis opibusque parati (ready for anything!)

When we work with clients, they often share what they’ve done - their results or achievements, and what they want to achieve - their goals and ambitions. There’s usually less acknowledgement of what strengths got them to where they are today, or what they’ll need going forward. Leaders spend a lot of time shaping and discussing strategy, but don’t always consider the strengths they have or the strengths they’ll need to be at their best in delivering it.

One of the first things we do, is help them identify the strengths they’ve used to achieve results or seen rise to the surface in times of challenge and opportunity. This is core to who they are at their best. We then get them to consider how they might tap into or extend these strengths to address their current priorities and move things forward. Are the strengths they have still relevant today? Can they extend them into new areas and what possibilities would that open-up? What new strengths are necessary for the journey ahead?

Progress is rarely dramatic. More often, it is a series of deliberate well-balanced steps taken by people and organisations who understand their strengths and use them effectively.

animus risu novatur (the spirit is refreshed with laughter)

Last month’s newsletter saw me eagerly anticipating my trip to Morecombe for the Morecombe and Wise Centenary. With many of you commenting on my posts, it reminded me just how central to the fabric of life M&W were in their day, but also the strength of the legacy they left behind.

It was great to be involved in the celebrations, and I thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity of interviewing Eric’s children, Gary and Gail on the memories of dad and what life was like living alongside the great comedy duo - Read it here.

Mel’s words on this month’s theme of strengths, had me reflecting on the conversations I was privileged to share with them and how strong the Eric and Ern partnership became not only due to the unique strengths of each performer, but also the collective strength of the duo. Eric had a daft, knockabout comedy style, while Ernie played the conventional, disapproving straight man, creating a unique and complex dynamic. This contrast was their strength.

Eddie Braben, the acclaimed writer for Morecombe and Wise, liberally used the strength of contrast throughout his work with the duo. Rather than follow the traditional ‘straight man’ as the voice of reason, whilst the comic creates chaos, he flipped the dynamic. He extended the strength to greater effect. He positioned his straight man, Ernie, as a pompous, self-deluded writer. An idiot who genuinely believed he was a literary genius. Whilst Eric Morecombe certainly played the fool, he was a knowing fool who constantly undermined Ernie’s delusions. The contrast was still in play, but now with Ernie’s ego as the punchline almost as often as Eric’s buffoonery, the comedy flowed evenly in both directions.

Playing to their individual and collective strengths helped provoke an undeniable affection and respect between Eric and Ernie that further anchored their comedy success and their deserved legacy.

Aequilibrium in omnibus (balance in everything)
One of the breakthrough moments we often have with leadership teams is when people see how their individual contrasting strengths can become a shared business strength. The push and pull between an AD’s creative vision alongside an ED’s sharp sense of commerciality; a CEO’s desire to look ahead and set an inspiring direction, alongside a COO’s ability to prioritise and deliver for today. These ingredients become strengths that they can tap into to help them survive, succeed and keep moving forward.

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